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The Grand Canary Sings Again

by Dutch DuChainey

Cheap Money, or P-Town won't close this September department...

I've been going through the last four or five issues of Tommy's noticing some of the fantastic opportunities being offered in September in P-Town; April and September are the two times of the year I head down.

But this September it's going to be a give away. The Haven House has a very special "Indian Summer Weekend" scheduled for September 18, 19, & 20th which includes admissions to the Crown and Anchor, Backstreet, and discount coupons. The Gifford House has a "Summer's End" weekend package September 11, 12, and 13th including gourmet dining at their own restaurant The Chameleon, continental breakfast, passes to Backstreet and Sidestreet, free drinks, etc. My favorite, however, is the "Indian Summer Daze Special" at Dexter's any night from Sept. 11th through Sept. 30th. Coupons for daily brunch at several of P-Towns best eaterys, also for dinner, free breakfast and more.

For single guys these programs run from about $40 to $70 and for couples $60 to $90 and with all the free dinners, drinks, coupons, etc. you won't need much more spending money.

Alphabetically some of the restaurants taking part are:Cafe Edwige, The Chameleon, The Courtyard, Landmark Inn, Poor Richard's Buttery and The Terrace.

Have a hot September in P-Town, I will... More speakers, more cruising department..

Because of the sell out at the first Lavender Night Production, they've set up another for August 22nd (or 23rd, depending on how you look at it). Check their ad out this issue. Before I forget this trip both decks will be outfitted with complete sound systems.

Hottest ever, well hung jocks department...

It's just a feeling (with a little inside information though) that July 26th is going to be the date of one of the top two or three contests ever held in New England. It's a Sunday night and the place will be DiRocco's in Tyngsboro. If your having trouble with directions to get there give Bill O'Hara, the manager, a call at 649-9186. First prize is $500 cash and a weekend for two at Tom Herman's place, Andrews Inn, including his famous gourmet (I hope that's spelled correctly) dinner. The audience picks the winner; see their ad in this issue.

2nd Anniversary for Skippers department...

You may think this is a commercial but I've got to plug Skippers' anniversary party coming up Tuesday, July 28. Afterall, they took the centerfold, didn't they? Seriously, though, I've heard rumors that The Lone Ranger (Steve). has pulled out all the stops in promoting this one. Tonto (Skipper's manager Dave) is going to prove he can throw a bigger, better party that any manager in the history of Skippers! $5 admission includes all the food you can eat, prizes, entertainment, and open bar 9 p.m. till midnight. I'll give you even odds Tonto succeeds. Watch for my report in two weeks!

Great majestic magnificent department...

No, I'm not describing Hit Parade. I'm describing last Monday night's strip contest at Skippers. John P. (my all time favorite) won again! I can't describe it! You have to experience it for yourself. Brudnoy, Rudd, and many others from the Upper Crust attended, why not you?

I'm not a Brownie department...

Once and awhile even a despicable, contemptible, infamous outlaw like Rustlers' manager Charlie Curtain does something right. Even through Trudy, Jackie (Binbo) O, Karla Classifieds, Mortisha, and others could'nt believe what I wrote in last week's editorial, they have to admit when C.C. does something he does it in a big way. He deserves credit.

Tom Herman department...

All gossip points towards the person of Tom (Andrews Inn) Herman concerning the night of Monday, September 14th. I know he's making agreements involving thousands of dollars in party supplies. Now if I can just get the low down before Franny does! I called Tom and talked with him twice this past week, but so far he has'nt budged on his plans. I only know he's got an advertising budget set aside for a media blitz around September first. We will be getting over 50% of the budget so Tom, loosen up, now's the time for free coverage. Call me, write to me, telegraph me, give me something so I can print, print, print!

What's going on in Worcester department...

I've heard of rivalries, but this is unbelievable. John (Tiny Weany Clam) Jay went up to Worcester to say "Hi" to Michael, who runs Club 288. At midnight I get a call from Desey who runs Isaiah's telling me he's got John J. tied up (with rope) and he won't be able to get back to Boston. Desey then had the nerve toask for advice; all I could say was, "Who cares? Who would want him anyways? The only one I can think of is the V.D. nurse at the Peter Bent Brigham Hospital!"

Elbow Room takes an Exlax department...

Larry (walk Park Square) Veator got the shock of his life last week at Cranes Beach. In-. stead of coming out of the dunes with a smile on his face, he came out with shit on his head. As a very reliable witness tells the story...a seagull spotted Larry, dive bombed from about 1000 feet, started to throttle back at about 100 feet, released its entire load (big, wet, and smelly) and took off, having scored a direct hit!!! Quagmire department...

Hello to Dixie, helping out at the House ofQuagmire during the past week. Special at Isaiah's department...

Jim Lazzell and Tom Proechel will be featured Sunday, July 26th from 6 to 10 pm.

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